My eyes open. I see nothing but darkness. I can't really tell if my eyes are actually open. Suddenly a light beams out from the right, streaking across the void. I quickly realize that I'm floating, though I'm still. It's like I'm sitting on a big black chair I can't touch. I try and move my body around to see if I glide somewhere else, but to no avail. I can move my body, but I don't change in axis or distance. I've nearly forgotten the streak of light no more that ten feet in front of me. I try and reach for it, but my arm is too short. In a sudden burst, another beam of light intersects the previous band of light perpendicularly. The light is blue now. I can feel myself moving; I don't understand how, because there's no wind resistance. I end up in the center of the crossing lights. A faint hum begins to arise and the lights begin to circle, with my body as it's axis. The quicker the lights rotate, the louder the hum becomes. I begin to panic. I try and move away, knowing full well that I'm powerless.
I blink, and I'm no longer in darkness.
I'm in a house, only everything is on the ceiling. Or, better yet, I'm on the ceiling. This is much more comforting than that unsettling darkness. Standing still, I wonder what I'm to do. I decide to explore. The ceiling isn't very high, so I have to duck a little bit to keep from bashing my head in to furniture. As I look around the room I'm currently in, I see no doors, except for one on the ceiling (really the floor). I try and jump for the handle, but there's something holding me down. My legs won't get off the floor. I can walk, I can run, I just can't jump.
Pondering the situation, I begin to evaluate my options.
1.) Sit here forever and die (not preferable)
2.) Figure out some way to jump (not likely)
3.) Get to the door some other way
There's a dresser on my right hand side and it reaches the ceiling (floor). There are ladder-like handles on each drawer, making my escapade up the wooden furniture easier. I begin my ascent. I get to the top quickly and swiftly, my head touching the ceiling (floor). I look around. A rug, an arm's length away, seems stuck on the ground beneath it. I reach for it, and by grabbing the rim I can tell it's not going anywhere. I leap two-handed on to the rug's rim and hold on for dear life. Even though I know that I won't die falling four feet back on to the ceiling, I still want to get to this door. I shimmy my way around the perimeter of the rug. I'm not to the door yet, but I'm gaining ground. There's a lamp next to the door. A tall standing one that's rather skinny. I just have to climb my way up to the door and I'm out of this weird place.
I jump for the lamp and as my body weight hits the lamp, it begins to sway violently, rolling in circles around it's axis. I clung on with all my might, slipping slightly. The lamp rebalanced itself, and I continued my climb. Half way up the lamp, it fell over. With a crash, the glass head sent shards flying all over me. Though I didn't feel a thing. I was now hanging on an toppled lamp, feet dangling over the ceiling, with shards of untouchable glass everywhere. I'm so confused. I finally swing my way over to the door. I grasp the handle and immediately, all light dims and I'm righted with the door.
I open the door and it ends me up in front of a large tree. My mind suddenly switches to some sort of third-person mode and gives me a glimpse of the whole planet. Yes, I'm not in a country, or some field, but on an incredibly small planet. One I could traverse fully in under ten minutes. The tree sways lightly in the cosmic breeze. There are two fruits on it, one on the right and one on the left. They both suddenly fall and lodge themselves in to the ground. The both burst in to doors. Both of the exact same shape and color.
I can feel the grass shifting beneath me. The grass ties itself together, scribing a message for me. There were two arrows, each pointing to a door. Below the arrows, the land reads, "On to wits end". I sat for a moment thinking of where door would take me. They both looked exactly the same, felt the same.
I opened the door to find...
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